Pastor Annette's Blog
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"OF ALL THE THINGS GOD HAS SHOWN ME, I CAN SPEAK BUT A LITTLE WORD . . . NOT MORE THAN A HONEYBEE CAN CARRY AWAY ON ITS FOOT FROM AN OVERFLOWING JAR."
~ MECHTHILD OF MAGDEBURG, 13TH CENTURY MYSTIC |
 December 31, 2024
Beloved: New Year’s Eve has never been a particularly exciting holiday for me. I much prefer quiet time at home over a fancy and loud party. Some friends are coming over tomorrow for snacks and a puzzle. We might go all out and watch a movie too! The older I get, the more the holiday becomes one of letting go and starting over. Putting away my Christmas decorations always gives me the itch to purge and organize my house. I sort every closet and rearrange books and yarn and fabric. I go through the magazines, keep some and set some aside to cut up for collaging. Expired food, ratty socks, things I never wear are tossed, recycled and donated. I disconnect the garden hose and put the comforter on my bed. I get out the unfinished knitting projects or books from the green bookcase. Finally, having touched and looked at most everything I own, I then settle into the warmth of winter, the great privilege of having a home. The harder work is internal, of course, letting go of broken things that only time can mend, time and my capacity not to pick at scabs of wounds time is trying to heal. Letting go instead of replaying scenes, wondering what else I might have said or done, if things might have worked out differently if only I had tried harder, then finally admitting I did the best I could and even if I didn’t the past is over and done. The faithful work from here is taking what lessons we can and being gentle with ourselves, even in our memories. I am looking forward to the new year with my whole heart: to new friends, new ministry, new quilt and knitting projects. My baby grandson will learn to walk and my 3-year-old granddaughter wants to learn to sew. In just a few weeks I’ll order new perennials for my flowerbeds. I expect to enjoy it all even if there is a crummy day here and there. I pray that in the balance of the memories and the expectation, you find yourself at peace and full of joy. ~ peace & prayers, pastor annette
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December 17, 2024
Beloved: Good morning (afternoon?) on this beautiful day in southern Indiana. By beautiful I mean sunny and 37 degrees. The high temperature will be 52 and then begin to drop and stay below freezing for at least a week. While I love winter for the coziness of flannel pajamas and hot tea, that’s all different since I’ve been volunteering with B-SWERS, the Bloomington Severe Weather Emergency Shelter. B-SWERS is a pop-up shelter, only open when the weather is dangerously cold or wet, run entirely by volunteers with hardly two dimes to rub together. Every night it operates is as much a miracle as the oil in the widow’s jar (2 Kings 4:1-7). We hardly know what we are doing and we have no money to do it - and yet somehow it gets done. But it has ruined winter’s coziness for me. Taking a hot shower and putting on clean pajamas to lay down in a real bed with my own clean sheets and blankets is a heartbreaking luxury some of our neighbors have given up remembering. Saturday I ran to the Kroger down the street for two things I needed to make my snack mix for the church cookie exchange. The store was so, so full of customers buying their week’s worth of groceries, pushing them to their cars to take to their kitchens to unload and put away, like you and I have a thousand times ourselves. But our B-SWERS guests aren’t at the grocery store buying cartloads of food. They are always hungry when they arrive, glad for whatever little snacks we have to give them, applesauce pouches and peanut butter crackers which they eat sitting on their floor mats. Not unlike preschoolers, now that I think about it, only with shaggy beards and tattoos. Insofar as winter’s old coziness is ruined, I have to say I like this better, hosting people for whom there’s no room anywhere else. Somehow it feels truer to the season we claim to be celebrating. Did people scooch closer together to make room for the holy couple, then rearrange again when Mary’s labor started, allowing her what privacy they could? Did they go through their packs to share what little they had with someone who needed it more? This pop-up shelter is cozy in its own way. The host churches turn the heat up and lend their coffee pots for decaf and hot water. We go through no less than fifty packets of hot chocolate a night. I see shelter guests sharing what they have every night I’m there: cigarettes and socks. They are the most exhausted people I have ever known, and yet sleep does not always come easy, so they sit and visit quietly, or listen to their music. I feel humbled to be among them, grateful to be received and included in their holy presence. I pray the season’s meaning is near to you as well. ~ peace & prayers, pastor annette Sweet & Spicy Snack Mix
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line two baking sheets with parchment paper. Mix cereal, crackers, pretzels and nuts in a large bowl. Melt butter and stir in brown sugar and cayenne pepper. Pour butter mixture over mix and gently toss until everything is fully coated. Divide mix evenly on the baking sheets, spreading into a flat layer. Bake for 15 minutes, one sheet at a time. Allow to cool before breaking apart into an airtight container. Note: I made several batches, adding more cayenne pepper each time to make heat taste a little stronger, without ruining it. Even ⅓ tsp was not too much. December 10, 2024
Beloved: I tried closing the door but Birdy whined and paced so much that I finally opened it to let her quietly lay next to the baby sound asleep in his car seat. She’s brought him three of her toys so far but he still hasn’t woken up to play with her. He’s three months old already, still small enough for me to watch and still get lots of work done, but social enough that all I want to do is hold him and trade smiles. Once he’s awake and fed, I’ll park him in front of the Christmas tree where he will stare at the lights and Birdy will stare at him for another thirty minutes or so. Then I’ll switch to a YouTube video of birds and squirrels on a feeder with background music. It’s one of Birdy’s favorites so they’ll both be entertained. On Christmas trees. I got mine at a yard sale two summers ago for $10. The original Kmart receipt was still in the box letting me know it was nearly twenty years old. Perfect fit for my little place, it's the easiest to set up I’ve ever had. Two of my ornaments are fifty years old, made from my elementary school pictures and some are new, almost entirely thrifted.* Between the tree, the creches on my sideboard and my front porch it’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas around here. Truth be told, left to my own heart and mind, I could do without all the fuss, but when the tree is up and the house looks so festive, I feel the endorphins gushing and I'm glad I made the effort. My grandgirl tells me my tree is beautiful and she loves the wooden Santa* by the front door. The result is well worth the effort, for me most of all. As hard as I imagined it might be, starting over has been harder still, and yet so much more trimmed with sweetness and blessing than I could possibly have predicted. My life feels smaller and at the same time, fuller than it ever has before. I am sometimes lonely but for the most part deeply connected to the people I love who love me too, and new friends I am making. So difficult as great change has been, I am here for it and making a new life in a new place I am so grateful and glad to be. The baby zonked out completely before finishing his bottle so he went down in the crib. Birdy has just now come to let me know he’s waking up, and she needs to get in the room to check on him. All her toys are piled just outside a door she could push open if she were not such a fraidy cat. I can see him on the monitor, watching the ceiling fan turn and playing with his fingers. I’ll leave him to entertain himself until he fusses to be picked up. Is there anything better than daytime dozing in one’s cozy bed? I pray that whatever you find yourself doing this season, you do it with oceans of grace and kindness toward yourself, your own heart and mind and spirit. Grace is all that’s called for now, in imitation of the grace come to us in Christ Jesus. ~ peace & prayers, pastor annette *Don’t buy any Christmas wrapping paper until you visit Habitat Restore, as they have oceans! The painted wooden Santa is from Aldi’s, $9.99 and can be turned over after Christmas for a winter theme. ** For our local friends: Join us for our special seasonal events, and also mark your calendar for our Christmas Eve service at 7:30 PM on the 24th. December 3, 2024
Beloved: Yesterday’s dusting of snow would have been more delightful had I not locked myself out of the house running out to the garage to fetch a new roll of paper towels. I had on slippers and pajamas. My phone was by my favorite chair. Luckily my neighbor’s front door is 20 steps from mine. I used her phone to call both daughters, both of whom don’t have a key to my house. I called the locksmith* who guessed it would be forty-five minutes, but within thirty my daughter swung into my driveway, there to check on me. She shoved my garage door not even very hard and to my alarm it popped right open into my laundry room. Turns out the strike plate was badly bent and too far recessed into the door frame to hold the bolt securely. The knob wouldn’t turn but the door itself wasn’t locked at all, nor has it been the whole two years I’ve lived here. Yikes! The locksmith fixed everything right up and made extra keys to give my daughters and my neighbor. I also hid one in the garage. All’s well that ends well, don’t you know. The lessons hang low here, the gift of good neighbors first of all. ~ Showing up early and unannounced, sitting at her cozy kitchen table in our pajamas, I felt as welcome as I’ve ever felt anywhere. ~ Good daughters are gold, never to be taken for granted, especially the resourceful ones who think to do more than just turn the knob. She came ready to break into the house depending on how cold I was. ~ Don’t panic right away took me a while, years in fact. Being locked out is an inconvenience, not an emergency as long as there is nothing on the stove or toddlers left alone. ~ Again and again, safety is an illusion. I thought I was locked in tight and one push was all it took to get through the door. We do our best and trust the keeper of our lives and life together to keep us cradled in the everlasting arms of God’s eternal peace. Happiness turns to joy for me when I lean into the faith I claim; whether we live or we die, we belong to the Lord. (Romans 14:8) I pray you are being extra gentle with yourself in this hectic season, making time to reflect and worship. ~ peace & prayers, pastor annette * If you are local and need a locksmith for anything, I cannot recommend J&S Locksmith highly enough. They have done lots of work for me over the years and are especially un-judgy of a lady who locks herself outside in the snow wearing only her pajamas and slippers. https://www.jslockandlawn.com/ |
I write a Tuesday morning devotional to members and friends of UBC. It is also posted here.
Enjoy! Pastor Annette Copyright
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